Let’s hear some stories from the thready-verse about how you guys met your significant other.
For me it was during the first year of COVID, my company asked who from Europe (I was living in Sweden) wanted to go for a three month business trip to coach a big Korean automotive supplier on how to do modern software development. Most of the other people had families and especially during COVID nobody wanted to travel. I said I could do it, even though I never coached before. But because nobody else volunteered they sent me and and another guy who also was single without a family, etc.
I was convinced that the other guy would have good game with the women here, and thought that there is no harm in installing some international dating app and to try my own luck. During COVID I just lost a ton of weight and found new confidence and it was far away from home and what happens in Korea stays in Korea and so on :D
Anyway, to my surprise during the first two weeks I got some matches and I hit it off with one of them. We met and started dating and very quickly fell for each other. Then when the 3 months were over, I asked the company if the customer would still have some use for my skills and they said yes and send me for 3 more months. I had to go back to Sweden to get a new Visa and spent another 2 weeks in quarantine (as the first time). But then the second tree months were over too and I asked again for more. By that time I was really sick of all the time in quarantine and asked if they could move me from the Swedish office to the Korean office and they agreed.
I went back to Sweden, threw away most of my stuff and put the most valuable things up on a friends attic and moved to Korea with one suitcase. I stayed at AirBnB’s for two more months and then we found an apartment and moved in together.
She has a daughter from a previous marriage and we now have a 1.5 year old son together and we still live in Korea :D
We both hung out on a Digimon fansite in high school lol
deleted by creator
I haven’t
Yet!
Met on irc a hundred years ago. Moved to a different state to be together. Got married, had kids, still together livin’ the dream. No regerts. Ragerts. Whatever.
Ah another IRC couple! My story is also on this thread and started on IRC as well.
That was a nice time, I regret those chatrooms and the dumb things we said over there.
+1 for IRC, but international move to be together for us. Still love him stupid much ♥️
Gary bar. We’re not gay.
Well, of course. You’re Gary.
But are you Gary?
Very deep and profound philosophical question to pounder.
Aren’t we all at least a little bit Gary?
Very common. About a quarter of our local gay bar gang are straight and they meet loads of others.
Coincidentally we also have two Garys.
OKCupid. And given what I hear about the state of dating apps today, it feels like we caught the last chopper out of 'Nam.
Same here. Been together 8 years, and from the sounds of it they got terrible ~7 years ago.
Made a friend in Final Fantasy XIV, which then blossomed into more. She moved across the country to be with me. We are one of those super-affectionate-joined-at-the-hip couples.
These stories of getting laid thanks to videogames seem like fantasy to me. I’ve been playing for 25 plus years of my life and still a virgin.
Ok, let me be fair and clarify my FFXIV story. Yes I did meet my SO in a video game, and that all does sound too good to be true. What I left out was the hard work getting myself into in therapy and on a path to meaningfully and deliberately work at being happy. By the time I met my girlfriend, I was already in a much better head space, and I was already trying to put myself out there to actively start dating.
Regarding your other comment about life that doesn’t reproduce being not worth living, I don’t buy that for a second. All life hits a dead end. All will need to contend with The Big Freeze, The Big Rip, or The Big Crunch.
Life is meaningful precisely because it is finite. Infinities are a dime a dozen. And infinities await us all.
The fact you need to be this paragon of goodness and being happy and cheerful is a death sentence for me. If that’s mandatory to get some company they I’m cursed to be alone and virgin for the rest of my life.
Finding a partner has two roadblocks.
- Would you date yourself?
- Could you date yourself?
The first asks are you fun to be around? If you were a fly on the wall in your house would you think “this is a person I want to be with, their activities, demeanor, and level of self-care are something I find attractive”. If you don’t want to be with yourself why would anyone else? Work to being and staying a person you enjoy being around.
The second is more applicable to people who are alone and introverted. If you lived two streets over from yourself how could you meet yourself. If you’re not someone that ever interacts with new people then how can you meet anyone? Find ways to open yourself up to meeting people you want to be with and who want to be with you. This could be through hobby based communities, to socializing with classmates and co-workers, to meeting friends of friends, to joining new groups or classes you’re interested in.
No I’m not a fun person. But I can’t erase myself… And trust me I can’t change. I don’t have co workers anymore and only did middle school. Nothing around my minuscule town is for me and I’m an poor immigrant, I have everything against me.
I’m not really going to argue with that much defeatism, I just want to clarify that being a person that’s enjoyable to be with doesn’t mean being a Hollywood movie definition of a “fun” person. It doesn’t require you to change into someone else. It just means you work to improve yourself, reduce the aspects of yourself you don’t like and increase the prevalence of aspects of yourself you do like.
You don’t need to become a “fun” person, just a YOU that you would want to spend time with.
Nobody is forcing you to improve yourself, but like I said before, if you wouldn’t want to spend time with yourself why would anyone else? Even if you live the rest of your life alone, would you not prefer being able to enjoy your own company?
No I wouldn’t. Because being alone for the rest of your life a death sentence regardless how I feel, I rather kill myself. A life that doesn’t reproduce is worthless, right now I’m worthless.
I’ve said this before in other comment, my father wasn’t a fun person, was almost as anti social as I am, he grew up dirt poor and was hit and lashed by his father, he became a scary muscular man, stone faced… Yet he managed to “secure” my mother for over a decade. He never believed in this bs of loving yourself or being “normally fun” yet he did his role in this world and got me and my brother.
Why not me? Just because I’m not fun?
A friend of my roommate at the time brought my now-wife to a New Year’s Eve party we were throwing. Her “friends” had made plans without her to go to a concert and deliberately kept it from her until tickets were sold out. She was all set to have a sad evening at home but my roommates friend made her come with to the party. We hit it off immediately
In a bar instead of online like NORMAL PEOPLE.
All jokes and sarcasm aside, I met my wife in a bar as her and her friend were trying to avoid a guy who seemed to be bothering them. Offered to buy the all a round of drinks and said we are at a table over in the corner if they wanted to join. My future wife and her friend said yeah lets go the guy had a sour look on his face and said no thanks but I will take the beer.
Had a wonderfully late night talking and laughing with her and fell in love shortly after.
So I was between relationships, hanging out with a friend, dropping her off at work when one of her coworkers catches my eye. I ask my friend who she is, and she laughs and says she’s in a long-term relationship. I laugh and move on.
Later on, I try to call my friend at her work, and this lady picks up the phone. I’m in a good mood, I flirt with her a bit and hang up once I’ve gotten the info about my friend.
Months after all that, I’m renting out a room and this friend refers her coworker who just broke up with her boyfriend. She moves in, engages in some rebound activity, and we hang out a bit. I determine I’m interested in her and she’s interested in me, but I’ve been dating someone for a while. This relationship is only a few months old, and it’s reminding me of my first marriage. I break it off and have sex with my roommate on what could charitably be called our first date. Within 6 months she stops having her own room.
We proceed to blow past a number of other red flags, and have now been together for about 14 years, married for 7.
I told (and tell) my kids that we did everything wrong in starting a relationship, but it worked out in spite of it
a then coworker that usually threw small get togethers for work friends, invited me to an event in his house. i thought it was the usual kind of reunion with a few people from work, so i show up with some snacks and a 12 pack. turns out it was a massive party with a couple hundred people from the small town he lives in. within the first 5 minutes i arrive, once i realize what’s going on and adjust to the unexpectedness of it all, i see someone dancing in a group of people that i find very attractive. after staring for a few seconds, they turn to see me and we exchange a few flirty looks. after a couple hours of talking with friends and mingling, we end up in the same table. although we haven’t talked to each other, we keep exchanging looks. no one has the courage get up and go talk to the other one. since i drove with friends, when they decide to leave i just follow them back to our car to go back home. but right at the door i’m like “fuck it, i’m going for it”, and i tell them i forgot something and have to go back. on my way back, i meet the other person halfway from the far back table we were sitting at to the entrance. we just stare at each other for a moment and they say: “hey, can i get your number?” to which i replied “that’s what i came back for.” we moved in together 5 months after that and we’ve been together for 7 years now.
We met in college. We are in the same class, and just sat together.
Funnily, I wanted to organize a D&D round, so I texted in the common class group if anyone was interested. No one publicly replied, and she felt sad for me - so she texted me privately and told me that she hopes someone answered me. That’s how we began texting and talking.
I think that’s a cute story :)
She sat in front of me in college English
Guy sitting next to her was trying so hard to understand FFXIV to get in her pants and I just slid in with a “X is actually the best don’t you even” when she said VII was the best FF
The teacher got involved with our arguments a few weeks later and added in that VI is actually the best, which was fun
She got me to start playing FFXIV, 5 years later COVID happened 1 week before our wedding so we broke up for a year, then got back together and got married in Vegas cuz it was at least open
Still play FFXIV together (DT is terrible though so I might not anymore), still cannot agree on which FF is the best. Though my argument has shifted to a tie between VI & X
Haha cute.
When XIV came out in the first couple weeks people were trying hard to get their relic weapons and you had to clear Garuda, ifrit, and titan hard mode. We had an 8 man raid group, and most of us had taken work off for a week or more. We LAN partied in one of our living rooms and when the odd one of us wasn’t online we’d just super drunk and run party finder one man down to drag some lucky random person through their relic check marks. One time I forgot to equip my job shard on Ifrit and not until the healers called for Mage’s ballad did we figure it out. Still made the kill, all the while this random person in our group was like “what on the absolute fuck is wrong with you people?! That was incredible!” We still joke that was world first Ifrit Hard mode Archer kill.
That was a really fun game with it came out. Lots of friends made being way more relaxed than WoW heroic guilds at the time.
For the record, FFIV and FFIX are the best :)
“5 years later COVID happened 1 week before our wedding so we broke up for a year” I’m confused - you said that as if COVID was obviously going to lead to breaking up.
It’s the direct catalyst as it caused lost job, moving, massive stress, family deaths, etc.
Things weren’t perfect before but the absolute insane stress the first 3 months of COVID put on both of us ended it for a while. Part of that was also the subconscious effect of our wedding being cancelled so close to it happening followed by that S T R E S S
1 is the best.
I dislike real time mechanics in turn based games so I MIGHT be biased.
I find all the hard to believe.
Basic reality is hard to believe?
I didn’t even mention how she impressed the entire class and made the teacher scramble for his book when she referenced a page and paragraph number for a quote during an oral presentation
Or how I proposed to her at Disney World in a way that according to staff has never been done before, though I sincerely doubt that
And those are both way less believable. All true, too!
It is for me. But is not your fault, is probably just me coping. I can’t believe someone is this lucky, meanwhile I’ve been gaming my entire life and I’ve had nothing, if anything probably ruined me even more.
I love final fantasy X, loved VIII. I didn’t got anything for it except realise that the world doesn’t work like those places, I’ll never get the girl. And nobody gives a fuck about what’s your favourite Final fantasy. Especially at my age.
Sounds like incel talk. Be careful about that.
Meeting people requires taking chances, being in uncomfortable situations, and often times, facing rejection. Rarely do people meet and click right off the bat.
Have you read the guy? he only mentioned a videogame and boom, love of his life. Why that never happened to me? Why I do I have to do way more and suffer more or become more physically attractive and active when deep inside I don’t wanna that?
Why I do I have to do way more and suffer more or become more physically attractive and active when deep inside I don’t wanna that?
Do you want an attractive and active partner?
Active? Not really. Just love me and be loyal, that’s it.
Met both of them the same night at a dungeon. Lucked the fuck out that day
Both? How does that work out?
Through the magic of falling in love with the two of them…
But for real all of us were pretty committed to polyamory when we met. My wife and I had both recently left partners who wanted monogamy and my girlfriend’s husband helped set her up with me.
Through the magic of falling in love with the two of them…
Is that a reference to the Technology Connections magic of buying two of them?
Oh absolutely it is
A dungeon? Huh?? Are you an anime character?
No I’m just a member of my local bdsm community
BDSM, so yes.
Brother, thats so fucking wholesome
