My son love Rocky horror picture show. We skip the big sex scene in the middle.
I hope you eventually reach him about the audience script. I wouldn’t take him to a live showing till highschool though.
The Aventures of Baron Von Munchausen is fine for kids.
Yes there’s some tasteful nudity, but if I’m being real it’s less than any of us are comfortable with in the home.
Uma Thurman as Venus, no less.
Robin Hood (Prince of Thieves, Men in Tights, etc.)
V for Vendetta.
Fight Club.
The Patriot
Braveheart
How old are your kids?
The only thing I can think of is Midnight Gospel, if your kid doesn’t mind the quick-talking podcast interview going on in the background. But the animation is great. 😃
ETA: Oops you said no animation. I’m sorry!
Edward scissor hands! And other Tim Burton
Galaxy Quest… while not a great movie, it’s a fun movie.
It’s not a great movie, it’s superb!
Excuse, me, what the fuck!? Galaxy quest managed to be one of the best Star Trek flicks out there while not even being in the same universe. By Grabthar’s Hammer, YOU…SHALL…. APOLOGIZE!
Yeah, what he said. Not a great movie? Are you nuts. I just can’t…
Simpsons, South Park, modern family, futurama, bobs burgers
My first thoughts were the naked gun or Monty Python movies.
Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy might be good too (at least the six episode TV series that just feels like a long film). I also think it’s a little more appropriate.
Naked Gun has some pretty sexual themes, Monty Python less so if you’re only talking Holy Grail. Life of Brian and Meaning of Life have loads of sexual themes and nudity.
The 1980s version of Time Bandits is made by the Monty Python team for a family audience!
I keep forgetting there’s a modern version, I’ll add the year to make clear that’s the one I mean!
I mean, Holy Grail has that whole nunnery sequence where they’re trying to get Galahad to fuck them
Still a lot more tame than the other films.
Being a lot more tame ≠ appropriate for children 😂
I did think of that scene fist which is why I was surprised that it was considered the one with the least sexual themes. That’s how I first found out spanking could be a sexual thing.
Tron. Labyrinth. Goonies. Legend. Etc.
And by etc, OP means Princess Bride.
Yes
I cannot for the life of me understand the love for this movie. But the love for it spans generations so assume I’m the one in the wrong, but I just don’t see it.
I love this movie so much, but I get it. I feel like you have to have seen it at a certain age in order to really feel it.
Alright, that may be fair. I didn’t see it till I was in my mid 30s. And I will fight to the death with sticks, anybody who doesn’t like hook. So, I get it, but I don’t get it.
It helps if you watch it over and over, until the tape wears out.
I like Hook too. I think I was 8 or 9 when it came out and it was amazing to me. My friend who is just a couple of years older didn’t like it because his younger siblings fucked that up for him by playing it on repeat.
The Everending Story
Yes.
The Everending Story
Is that a short movie about a kid finishing reading a book about a hero completing his quest?
Watched that for the first time while really high in college, and the horse sinking in the swamp really fucked me up lol. I’ve had no desire to revisit it, personally :/
Kids and animals dying really ruin media for me
It’s OK, Artax the horse survived.
Since its 25th anniversary of its western release just passed and it’s on my mind, Princess Mononoke is a good one. It’s bloody but tasteful.
My father got into serious trouble with my mom when my little brother was two because of Blazing Saddles. My mom had taken me somewhere, and my brother was in the playroom playing with blocks. Dad figured it was safe to watch Blazing Saddles, as little bro wasn’t able to see the TV, and he could see little bro.
A few days later, little bro walks up to my mother and casually called her a “tonic bitch,” and wandered off.
Needless to say Mel Brooks was banned in our house for a few years, but we all loved it when we were allowed to watch it. Spaceballs as well.
All the films in the following list are PG-13, PG, or older and unrated, and I went light on sexual themes in the PG-13 part. This is just me quickly going through my own movie collection.
PG-13:
- Arachnaphobia
- Big Trouble in Little China
- Cabin Boy
- Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
- Hunt for the Wilderpeople
- Kung Pow: Enter the Fist
- Little Shop of Horrors
- Lord of the Rings Trilogy
- The Mummy
- The Mummy Returns
- Pirates of the Carribean
- Princess Mononoke
- Raising Arizona
- Sneakers
PG:
- *batteries not included
- The Adventures of Baron Munchausen
- Back to the Future trilogy
- Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure
- Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey
- The Dark Crystal
- Dreams by Akira Kurosawa
- Ghostbusters
- Ghostbusters II
- The Goonies
- Gremlins
- Gremlins 2: The New Batch
- Howls Moving Castle
- The Hudsucker Proxy
- Jewel of the Nile
- Napoleon Dynamite
- Naussica of the Valley of the Winds
- Porco Rosso
- The Princess Bride
- The Producers (1967)
- Indiana Jones original trilogy
- Real Genius
- Shaolin Soccer
- Spaceballs
- Strange Brew
- Three Amigos!
- Time Bandits
- Twins
- Uncle Buck
- War Games
- The Wizard (1989)
- Wizards (1977)
- Young Frankenstein
Unrated:
- The Great Escape
- Hundreds of Beavers
- Kind Hearts and Coronets
- Nova Seed
- Rashomon
- Seven Samurai
You might want to switch Gremlins to the PG-13 category. The PG-13 rating was invented as a response to Gremlins being PG.
https://www.syfy.com/syfy-wire/how-gremlins-helped-change-movie-ratings-forever-with-pg-13
Really? I always heard/read that it was as a response to Alien getting an R rating.
And actually, Alien is not a bad answer to this question. It was my 9yo and 7yo’s first R rated movie and they absolutely loved it. Plus, it sets them up for more good sci-fi down the road. My kids just watched Interstellar at 11 and 9 and really enjoyed themselves
Showed my 10 and 9 year old boys Alien a few months back. Followed by Aliens (and then AVP). 9 year old was way more scared by Aliens and AVP than the first Alien. But I tested the water on them with Prey, which they really dug.
I thought Prey would be great for pre-teens, but my wife hasn’t seen it and was super skeptical (and she didn’t want to watch it, which was probably more of the issue), so… shrug. Next time she’s having a night out, we’ll probably do it.
Tangentially related (since this is our go to when the wife is out of town), all 3 of my kids have loved kaiju movies since the oldest was in diapers, so if you haven’t watched Pacific Rim and the modern “kaiju-verse” (or whatever it’s called), I highly recommend it, ideally from a pillow fort on the couch so you can play act being kaiju and knocking over your own city if it gets slow.
Some men are Baptists. Others, Catholic. But me? I’m a Godzilla fan. (Also, Episcopalian, but you get what I mean).
For real tho, I’ve been into kaiju films since I was about six and have introduced them to my kids. My 4 y/o daughter is probably the most obsessed of them. She really digs Godzilla: King of the Monsters. And we all had a blast with Pacific Rim. I even took my eldest to see Godzilla -0.1 in theaters.
Prey is great. It really mixes up the Predator franchise and feels super fresh. It’s pretty violent but, to me, just a smidge above typical PG-13 violence—there is animal violence, so keep that in mind if that’s a problem (you see a few animals get skinned and a wolf gets disemboweled, but it’s shown from a distance and is quick; there’s a pretty intense scene with a bear that gets kinda bloody, but honestly the animal scenes are kinda obviously CGI so it doesn’t look overly realistic). There’s also a bit in the middle that’s in untranslated French, but that’s a cinematic choice. My kids were kinda distracted because they thought the subtitles were broken lol.
FYI PG-13 seems to only be a rating in a handful of countries, such as america, Iraq, Lebanon, Singapore and Qatar (I hadn’t heard of it so did a quick search).
In Canada and Australia for example, Gremlins is rated PG
Done, it was showing as PG in my collection, thanks for the tip.
Depends on what countries classification system you’re using. Most countries don’t use pg-13
I came here to offer suggestions, but damn my dude, blockbuster never would have died if they had you in charge!
If the adventures of Baron Munchausen is the movie I think it is, Uma Thurman’s nipple is on screen for a minute. Just the one nipple I believe.
I watched Gremlins 2 when I was 13, and it scarred me for life. I did not find it funny at all, and it gave me nightmares for days. I have not seen it as an adult, and currently being 40+ years old, I probably never will.
Huh, I was only 11ish watching it, I think I thought the first one was scarier or had a darker tone, the pool scene was a bit scary for one, maybe it was the music? Also they seemed much more menacing in 1 but it could have been due to the slapstick comedy it was sandwiched with in part 2 that made it feel less frightening.
All that said, I ended up watching Nightmare on Elm Street too young so that may have skewed my interpretation of scary. Yes younger than Gremlins 2, but I also quite enjoyed Nightmare on Elm Street and watched them all (well not 2 as much), so maybe just my experience.
If you’re a Star Trek fan the Voyager doctor is there for some comedy, if you’re a Smallville fan Lyonel Luthor is there…has a decent cast for the movie it is. Oh and forgot Christopher Lee too heh.
Haven’t watched it in years still.
You’re going to mention Shaolin Soccer but not Kung-Fu Hustle? Come on.
Kung Fu Hustle is rated R, which was outside of the general range of ratings I went for. It’s been a while since I watched it and I couldn’t remember specifically what got it that rating.
…“fairy”?
Homophobic insult to an effeminate man
This person movies…
People are “comically” stabbed by knives
I assume they’re talking about the “who’s throwing handles?” scene, which is fucking hilarious.
Is it really? Probably all the violence. That’s a shame.
Meh, there’s plenty worse violence daytime anime. I think if a parent is ok with Shaolin Soccer then Kung Fu Hustle is fine.
Kung Pow: Enter the Fist is better.
Proceed with caution with the Dark Crystal. Idk if I was too young to watch when I did, or what, but it scared the bejeebus outta me; I couldn’t even look at the cover until I was an older teen
Nope. I didn’t see that movie till I was 23 and my reaction at the end was, “Your parents showed you this as a kid and thought that was ok, but TMNT was ‘too violent’‽” This was said to my girlfriend at the time. That movie was DARK. I haven’t seen it since then, so about 20 years, and IIRC genocide, slavery, and the apocalypse all feature heavily in the main plot, and almost the only redeeming character in the movie was named Fizzgig. He was a mutant Pomeranian.
The Iron Giant
I would recommend polterghast as a nice PG* horror movie.
*it came out before pg-13 existed.
Fuck all that. 5th-grade me didn’t sleep for two weeks behind that seeing that shit in the theater.
