Ill start:
“Me cago en tus muertos” - ill shit all over your dead relatives. Spanish.
In Quebec French, people sometimes say of someone who’s not particularly bright:
“His mom rocked him/her too close to the wall.”
It’s just so… vivid and random.
A strong insult in french would be to tell that someone has been “fini à la pisse”.
I don’t know how to translate that but it would means that their dad did not have enough sperm so he used urine to conceive them.
Oh cool, we have a very similar one in German: “His/her swing stood too close to the wall.”
Bizarre j’ai jamais entendu ça…
C’est bien connu en France:
Il a été bercé trop près du mur.
Mieux vaut tard que jamais pour l’ajouter à mon arsenal d’insulte 😁
Not my native language but the German language has some pretty fantastic words/insults like “punchable face” (backpfeifengesicht) and “brain denier” (gehirnverweigerer).
Also Knödelfriedhof (dumpling graveyard) for obese people is kind of funny I think.
I hadn’t heard that one before but your opinion is objectively wrong: It’s not “kind of funny”, it’s hilarious.
People got banned from Reddit for less.
I caught a ban from reddit for pointing out that COVID 19 could kill you. This was during the height of the pandemic too.
People caught bans for some spectacularly stupid stuff on reddit and their reporting system is straight up broken, so plenty of bad shit goes ignored indefinitely.
“Dich soll der Blitz beim Scheißen treffen!”
May lightning strike you while you shit. One of my personal favourites.
Oh, I’ve several. Irish people love a good curse.
Go mbrise an diabhal do dhá chois May the devil break your legs
Go ndéana an diabhal dréimire do chnámh do dhroma May the devil make a ladder out of your spine
Go n-imí an droch aimsir leat That the bad weather leaves with you
Go n-ithe an cat thú is go n-ithe an diabhal an cat May the cat eat you and may the devil eat the cat
And my personal favourite: Lá breá ag do chairde, dod adhlacadh May your friends have a fine day, burying you
“Te falta una patata para el kilo” (in Spanish)
English: “You’re missing one potato for the kilo.”
When you want to call someone a fool or an idiot, you question if they’re in their right mind, if they use their head before speaking or doing something.
Spanish from Spain, right?
In Argentina we say
- “Le faltan jugadores” (He/she is short of a few [football/soccer] players)
- “Le faltan caramelos en el frasco” (He/she is missing candies in the jar)
“Le faltan jugadores” (He/she is short of a few [football/soccer] players)
no fucking way lol
German Korinthenkacker (currant shitter) is someone who tries to win an argument by looking at unimportant details.
Not that it’s untranslatable, but I enjoy it quite a lot.
Поцілуй бузька в калатало - go kiss a stork on the knocker.
If you ever heard storks, you’ll recognize the dismissiveness of this statement.
Gea mor net af die Kondl. “Don’t step on my milk jug”. You’re annoying me and you better shut up or go away.
Konnsch mor in Buggl oirutschn. “You can slide down my back”. I don’t give a fuck.
German dialect from Tyrol.
Very Belgian: He doesn’t have all his fries in the same bag / Il n’a pas toutes ses frites dans le même sachet
Meaning that he’s/she’s dumb or confused :D
Similar to “He’s one can short of a six pack”
The English equivalent being, “She is several chicken nuggets short of a happy meal”
The German equivalent is “Not all cups in the cupboard”
The Australian equivalent is “a few snags (sausages) short of a barbie (barbeque)”
A few sandwiches short of a picnic.
A few cards short of a deck.
- Γαμώ το σπίτι σου (literally: fuck your house) I guess this basically means to fuck your whole family
- Γαμώ τη Παναγία σου (literally: fuck your Saint Mary)
- Γαμώ το Χριστό σου (literally: fuck your Jesus)
- Να μου κλάσεις τον πούτσο (literally: fart my dick) I guess this means “I’ll fuck you from behind”
- Πάρ’τα 3 μου (literally: take my 3) The 3 is implied for balls, and they’re 3 instead of 2 because it’s more manly I guess lmao
- Κλάσε μου τα 3 (literally: fart my 3) A combination of the previous two
- Αρχίδι (literally: testicle) You can actually call someone a testicle in Greek
If you rotate a 3 clockwise it becomes a pair of balls
We have something similar to “fuck your house”. “Fuck your couch” is a popular insult in American English thanks to Rick James and The Chappele Show. Still, “fuck your house” is more extreme because I guess it includes the couch, too.
Those are all amazing insults that you listed, btw.
“Spargeltarzan”, which is German for “asparagus Tarzan”. Basically someone who is physically weak, but tall and lanky.
I also like “Lauch”, which just translates to “leek”, the veggie. Oh, and “Bohnenstange”, which means bean stalk. We do seem to have quite a few vegetable-related insults in German, now that I think of it…
German: “Dich soll der Blitz beim Scheißen treffen” - Lightning shall strike you while you’re taking a shit
Best insult ever, imo.
“I piss in your mother’s death”
Alternatively, “May Stalin fuck you”
And yes, I live in Eastern Europe.
May Stalin fuck you
Please share how to say this
Fută-te-ar Stalin
Pronounced: Foot-uh-tea-are Stalin
Congrats! You can swear in Romanian now!
Yiddish is not my native language but I think this one is so good it absolutely deserves a mention:
All of your teeth shall fall out except one that gives you a massive toothache.
كول هوا
“Kawl hawa”
Literally “eat air” in Arabic
Means shut up
That’s hilarious
Oh that is fantastic. I need to use that one.
“Enculeur de poules mortes” which basically means dead chicken fucker. It’s translatable but sounds so much better in french.
Something about how fancy French sounds, juxtaposed with how vulgar the insult is, that makes it stick.
Like a guy in a tuxedo, but with his junk out
In English it’s more like a guy at Walmart in sweatpants with his junk out; not that shocking
I knew about “enculeurs de mouches”, or fly fucker, that is said about a person that is way too picky about useless details
In Dutch that would be called an ant fucker (mierenneuker)
A few years ago, when #MeToo was a big thing, I took a photo of an ant, and slapped the text #MierToo, specifically to mock and send to mierrenneukers
I have never heard this in my life. Where are you from?
Probably Quebec or Montreal.
Eww, gross.
spoiler
Just kidding y’all :)
