cross-posted from: https://infosec.pub/post/14650446
As I was growing up, my family had a couple of sayings I took for granted were universal, at least within my language. As I became an adult I have learned that these are not universal at all:
- the ketchup effect. It is an expression meaning that when things arrive, they all arrive at the same time. Think of an old school glass ketchup bottle. When you hit the bottom of it, first there is nothing, then there is nothing and then the entire content is on your food.
- faster than Jesus slid down the mount of olives. Basically a saying that implies that the mount of olives is slippery due to olive oil and Jesus slipped.
- What you lack in memory, your legs suffer. An expression meaning that when you are forgetful, you usually need to run back and thus your legs suffer.
Please share your own weird family sayings.
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“Wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one fills up first.” - Find a way to do it yourself, because it isn’t happening otherwise
That one is in my family so I think it my be a bit more universal than you thought
Unless… This is a family reunion?
I think we kiss now. I don’t know how these things are supposed to work I’m from the deep south
My family too. They really looked down on cursing but shit was the exception. I remember my mom getting mad at young teenage me for saying “how the hell do you get this thing off” but if I’d said “this is bullshit” it would have been fine.
Another classic. I had never heard her say fuck until she was so mad at me she said it. Then she became even more furious because I made her say it.
Unless we’re related, this one isn’t just your family.
It’s like Olive Garden up in this thread
The last one is a legit saying in Germany “Was man nicht im Kopf hat, hat man in den Beinen” (What you don’t have in your head you have in your legs.)
If you are not german (I guess if you were, you would know this is a common saying) maybe your family heard it from some German friends or acquaintance and adapted it.
For your third example - my mom says “My head wouldn’t save my heels”
A few from my grandfather and father which aren’t unique to them but aren’t universal:
- “red as a smacked ass” or just “smacked ass” - referring to someone who is embarrassed so their face is flushed or generally just a fool
- “Born on Wednesday looking both ways for the weekend” - someone with a lazy eye
- “Scissor grinder” - aggravating person, or someone who inserts themselves into other’s business. Ostensibly referring to a person who travels offering sharpening services because they come by unannounced and make a lot of noise in the street.
Related, but not a saying, we had a family tradition at Easter where my grandparents/parents would put all the egg dyes together and dye a final egg a murky brown. That egg was given to the kid with the worst behavior over the last year. It was called the “pissmuckle” egg. There was no discussion after you got it either or any punishment, it was just a censure.
Did the recipient eat it?
That’s what always happened since no one had the courage to just throw it away.
6 one way, a half dozen the other.
This is fairly common in my experience.
Tomato, tomatoe
“Everybody’s record starts somewhere.” If you’re considering doing something illegal, is this worth starting your record? (It’s also used to dismiss someone getting into trouble for the right reason.)
I’m realizing that my previous one sets a bad tone for this, but I had hippie uncles, and we were all taught, “We do not cooperate with the police.” Some of us were recently reminiscing about one of my dead uncles and said, “We do not-!” And the rest of us said, “-cooperate with the police!”
All the rest of them are your typical American South sayings.
“If you sing at the table you’ll cry before you go to bed.” I thought it was super common until I said it to my kid and my partner thought I was crazy.
If you’ve got a dead hooker in the trunk drive the speed limit.
One crime at a time!
You’ve got to drink enough in your youth, so you can live off the bottle deposits when you’re old.
Ha! “Try to save so you don’t live on bottle deposits” I’ve heard.
That one is stupid with two O’s
Plenty people in my family refer to cat kneading, in Portuguese, as “dancinha do leite” (milk dance). And I always took it as if it was as universal as “amassar pãozinho” (to knead bread). Well, it isn’t; I discovered this in my adulthood. Apparently it’s from Italian.
There’s also bunch of references to someone making things worse as “batata verde” (green potato); like “xô, vá ser batata verde noutro canto” (shoo, go be a green potato elsewhere) or “[pessoa] é uma batata verde” ([person] is a green potato). I get the reasoning, but no idea where my family got this from.
I’m going to start using green potatoe, thank you.
Cats make biscuits!
“There’s always money in the banana stand”
“The goat man will get you.”
Used as a warning when doing something careless that would invite predators. My great-grandma came to the US from the Czech Republic and told the story of a man who raised goats and would steal children and break into homes at night. It was a reminder to lock your doors and valuables, and to never walk alone in shady neighborhoods.
I wish I could remember how to say it in Czech. It began with “Kuzubah”.
Kozí muž si pro tebe přijde (The goat man will come for you) ?
My grandma used to say “drinking coffe standing up brings bad luck”.
While I’m not superstitious, I actually believe that taking the proper time to experience the little daily treats is necessary to get the best out of your dayI completely agree, I view it like meditation. Sit down and actually enjoy your coffee, sit and listen to music without distraction, sit and truly enjoy the moment. Without phone etc
“you don’t speak unless spoken to”
(i had a shitty family lol)
